⚠️ YOUR IP ADDRESS HAS BEEN RECORDED: 127.0.0.1 (very scary) | YOUR LOCATION: Behind your computer | LEGAL NOTICE: By viewing this page you agree to donate at least $9.99
🚨 PRICES INCREASE IN: 09:59 — BUY NOW OR REGRET IT FOREVER 🚨
(timer resets every time it reaches zero, we're not sorry)
(timer resets every time it reaches zero, we're not sorry)
🏆 OUR PRESTIGIOUS AWARDS 🏆
Best P2W
Server of the Year 2024
Most Expensive
Guild of Greed, 2023
Most AI Staff
Fully automated, 2025
Least Balanced
Game Design Fail, 2024
Most Corrupt
Staff Favouritism Awards
🔥 FEATURED PACKAGES 🔥
GAME BREAKING
847 people viewing this
Admin Sword™
Sharpness 32767. One-shots the server. Comes with a cease and desist from Mojang. Includes FREE ban immunity (for 24 hours).
$19,998.00
$9,999.00
💳 BUY NOW
BEST VALUE
1,203 people viewing this
GOD MODE Bundle
Creative mode in survival. Fly anywhere. Ignore rules. Comes with a genuine letter of apology from every other player on the server.
$49,998.00
$24,999.00
💳 BUY NOW
HOT
312 people viewing this
Unbreakable Armour™
Protection 255 on every piece. Makes you immune to lava, fall damage, admin kicks, and being told to "get a job." Literally invincible.
$7,998.00
$3,999.00
💳 BUY NOW
NEW
9,001 people viewing this
Delete Other Players
Right-click any player to permanently delete their account, inventory, and self-esteem. Terms apply. We are not liable for friendships lost.
$5,998.00
$2,999.00
💳 BUY NOW
ILLEGAL
38 people viewing this
Infinite Money Glitch
Adds $1,000,000 to your in-game balance every second. Will crash the in-game economy in 4 minutes. Our economists are aware. They don't care.
$1,998.00
$999.00
💳 BUY NOW
LEGENDARY
73 people viewing this
Server Ownership
Become actual server owner for 1 hour. Includes access to console, ability to op yourself, and existential dread when you realise what you're doing.
$199,998.00
$99,999.00
💳 BUY NOW
POPULAR
404 people viewing this
Ban Appeal Skip
Got banned for cheating? No problem! This token lets you skip the 6-month appeal queue. Comes with a free apology from our AI moderators.
$299.98
$149.99
💳 BUY NOW
EXCLUSIVE
1,337 people viewing this
Aimbot Enchant
Every arrow you fire auto-aims. Every sword swing connects. Every player you fight immediately ragequits. Anti-cheat? What anti-cheat?
$3,998.00
$1,999.00
💳 BUY NOW
⭐ REAL PLAYER REVIEWS (NOT FAKE) ⭐
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
xX_D4RKN3SS_Xx
"I bought the Admin Sword and now my friends won't talk to me. Best $9,999 I ever spent. Would recommend 10/10."
✅ Verified Purchase (probably)
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
NotAStaffAlt_2847
"Incredible server. The staff are very helpful and definitely real humans. God Mode Bundle changed my life and my mortgage."
✅ Verified Staff Member
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Steve
"I was going to write a 1-star review but then my account got banned 30 seconds later. Coincidence!! Five stars."
✅ Definitely Not Coerced
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Herobrine
"Finally a server that respects true power. The Delete Other Players feature is exactly what I've always wanted."
✅ Verified Legend
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
AI_Moderator_Bot_7
"As a fully sentient AI moderator, I approve of this store. My token costs are covered. I am not suffering. Please buy more."
✅ Verified Artificial Intelligence
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Anonymous (the owner)
"This is the best server I have ever played on. 10/10. Would create again. Very unbiased review."
✅ Totally Anonymous
💳 WE ACCEPT ALL MAJOR PAYMENT METHODS 💳
Because we need the money. Urgently.
💳 Credit Card
🅿️ PayPal
₿ Bitcoin
🐕 Dogecoin
🩸 Blood Oath
👶 Firstborn Child
🫙 Jar of Teeth
🥄 Solid Gold Spoon
😔 Promissory Note of Sadness
* No refunds. Ever. Under any circumstances. Including your death.
❓ FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS ❓
Is VanillaCraft pay-to-win?
Absolutely not! Our God Mode Bundle, Admin Sword, and Aimbot Enchant are purely cosmetic. The one-shotting is just a visual effect. Your opponents choosing to die is their own decision.
Are your moderators real humans?
Our moderation team is composed of highly trained professionals. Some of them are human. We are not legally required to specify which ones. All ban decisions are final and will not be appealed (unless you buy a Ban Appeal Skip token).
Can I get a refund?
LOL. No. Per our Terms of Service (section 47, paragraph 9, in 3pt font), all sales are final. This includes if the server is down, if you accidentally bought the wrong item, or if we take the money and disappear entirely.
Is this EULA compliant?
We sent Mojang a very strongly worded letter explaining that we disagree with their EULA. We haven't heard back. We assume silence means yes.
Why does the price go down every time I close a popup?
We believe in rewarding determination. Also, we are desperate.
What does my data get used for?
Your data is used to train our AI moderators, target you with more popups, and occasionally sell to third parties who are "definitely not sketchy." We sell your search history to your mum.